ranchandsyrup

Fantasies of Trouble

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I have been horrible about blogging, and I really don’t mean to, it’s just that I am pregnant!

It’s great to have an excuse most everyone enthusiastically accepts. Being pregnant with my second has me thinking quite a bit, and since I am stuck without my favorite vices, I’m remarkably clear headed. When a woman gets pregnant, she automatically becomes an angel. It doesn’t matter what she was doing the day before, or how she became pregnant, she is now an innocent blessed creature!

The first time I was pregnant, I was shocked how people treated me.  My first experience was in the mall walking by an Orange Julius.  The owner saw me sauntering by and gave me an ice cream cone, just because I was pregnant! It was so sweet, I couldn’t believe it! Yes, there are the occasional jerks who don’t offer to hold the door, or give up their seat, but for the most part, people are really accommodating to those with child. 

Thank you, thank you humanity for being kind to us gals.  But for a mischievous momma like I, it seems like the perfect time to get in trouble.  I was incredulous by the assumptions of character bestowed on a pregnant person.  Immediately, I was given benefit of the doubt, praise before criticism. 

Why is it the moment a person becomes pregnant their moral status skyrockets?

For fun, I googled pregnant theft… All the below stories happened in the past two months….

  1. 1.       This week, theft at a pizza joint (I assumed it was that she stole pizza, but no)

http://www.mywesttexas.com/top_stories/article_5edc4c54-a08b-11e2-95ff-001a4bcf887a.html

  1. 2.       Stealing a car, while drunk (and pregnant)

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/north/story/2013/02/27/north-yellowknife-woman-sentenced.html

  1. 3.       Another gem, 8 months pregnant, car being towed, so pregnant lady stole the tow truck:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2211714/Pregnant-Ohio-woman-goes-high-speed-chase-stolen-tow-truck-attached-repossessed-vehicle.html

Pages of more stories come up with a simple google search, but you get the point…

Being pregnant does not make one an awesome person.  It means she is able to reproduce.  Yes, pregnancy is a miracle, but the body carrying it might be devilish.  People don’t change overnight, but society thinks they do. 

I fancy myself a reasonably good person.  I am definitely not perfect, but not a devil either 😉  For some reason, I found myself intentionally mischievous later in my pregnancy.  I couldn’t help it! Granted, my idea of rebellious may not warrant news, but I definitely had my moments.  Thinking back, I remember a few big wins for the pregnant lady. 

  1. Post Office: I knowingly stole packaging and tape from the post office.  You know the self service area where you can pick out packing, and then you have to go pay for it.  I didn’t pay for the tape, or the envelope. 
  2. When I realized people would give me free food, I would always ask for extra dipping sauces.  No one ever charged me for more dipping sauces.
  3. I utilized my condition to avoid waiting in lines, getting front row parking and elicit sympathy from people who were typically difficult to deal with.
  4. Many more, but I can’t tell all my secrets since I am on round two!

OK, I realize my idea of breaking the rules might not be as extreme as the above news samplings, but it was fun!  I loved tricking people, trivial as it may have been.  Why? Because I am the same silly girl I was before the moment of conception.  The only difference is the miracle growing inside.  In some ways, it is liberating breaking the rules; just to prove to yourself YOU are still in there!  I needed to know a baby wasn’t turning me into an uber-boring grown up who wouldn’t enjoy the same things I did before being a mom. 

Remember, becoming pregnant, doesn’t make a woman a saint.  She is still the same lady you loved/hated before, and probably wanting to get into trouble.  I know I do!

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