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Archive for the tag “politics”

The Faulty Side Of Loyalty

I wrote this blog last week and planned on finishing it before something happened.  It directly correlates to this thus I am going to preface my blog on what happened.

On Wednesday I was attacked by a dog.  I was working, my dogs kept barking and I looked outside to see a large dog running up the street. Many of my neighbors are elderly so I went outside to help.  The dog saw me and began running toward me.  I was elated at first. But then I noticed something different.  He wasn’t a pup and was not coming to play.  He quickly went for my left leg and luckily bit my pants.  He then lunged and bit my right leg.  I kicked him in the jaw. He was not fazed. He continued to lunge while I kept eye contact, yelled NO and kicked while taking small steps backward.  I got to the front door of my house by the time the owner and neighbor arrived to leash him.  The owner apologized profusely. The other neighbor helping her got angry and told her, “This is the third time your dog has bitten someone. This dog needs a new home.” The dog’s owner dismissed him because she is loyal to a fault.

Back to the original blog:

I have been thinking about the idea of loyalty for the past few months.  Loyalty is an attribute everyone identifies with.  Have you ever met a person stating otherwise? Loyalty is tossed around like most adjectives- Also fun, friendly, outgoing and of course kind.

Loyalty can apply to myriad situations.  It could be in friendships or relationships. It could be family, pets, job, or a political party.  People really like touting themselves as loyal.

The reason I have been thinking so much of this lately is quietly watching others display their loyalty in various areas while not tending to others.

My Dad always spoke about being loyal to a fault.  Over the years I admired this quality and followed suit.  As an adult I found that loyal to a fault is flawed.

When we say we are loyal humans at what point are we not?  Is it when beliefs do not coincide? What happens when friends don’t want the best for us? How long do you stay when your partner continually mistreats you?  Or support a family member making poor choices? Do you stay loyal to a job or person that doesn’t value or celebrate you?  What about the animal you love that continually acts out?  Most recently, what do you do when your political party leaves you unsatisfied?

Do you stay? Do you remain loyal to a fault?

My thoughts are what loyalty really means to you.  Everyone is quick to hold on to the word and describe themselves as such.  But what if being loyal to a fault isn’t the best option?

Mike and I have had time off this past month and we have talked at length about the same questions.  Loyalty is something to be cherished in the right circumstances.  However when does a person decide, “I am not loyal to dysfunction?”

More than anything I am interested in your insight.  What makes you loyal?  When do you decide to NOT be loyal?

Best,

Marianne

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Where’s my imaginary twin?

 Twins

The last few months, I have been doing a lot of introspective thinking.  I have been quietly (well, as quiet as a talker like me can) listening to others, hoping to learn a bit.  After sitting on the sidelines, processing, not blogging (oops), I am ready to discuss my observations.  There has been an overwhelming theme invading my life, through friends, social media, even Mike. 

The dreaded go to, ever popular and increasingly powerful word, offend.

 Before beginning this article I looked up the dictionary definition.

Offend: Verb. Cause to feel upset, annoyed and resentful.

UGH, I don’t like any of those words! Who wants to be annoyed, resentful, or upset?

Apparently, a large number of people. Since being offended has been a predominant nuisance, skulking behind every tree I skip by, I thought I would take a closer look.  My findings? The verb “Offend” is being vastly overused, and in my humble opinion, largely misused. 

Mike is typically my go to in all areas of grammar, wrong definitions (see https://ranchandsyrup.com/2013/02/20/my-grammar-bes-ebonics-gin-tonic-and-chronic/) Whenever he explains an annoying misuse of a word, I always ask him for an example to ensure:

1. Clarification

2. To see if I can pat myself on the back for not being the guilty party.  That being said, examples are my favorite way of furthering my point.

 Examples of correct and incorrect uses of being offended:

  1. “Hey Mari, your dress makes your butt look huge.  Don’t worry though, your makeup looks fantastic!”
    1. I’m offended!
  2. “Mari, your rant about women’s rights was really offensive.  You should really think about what you say.”
    1. Offensive??

Luckily, neither of these are real, but you catch my drift.

When did different opinions elicit the term offensive?  Politics tend to be the most often referenced, but religion is the same hot button.  Of course, offended parties tend to span the usage across even the most trivial areas including table manners, music, television etc. 

Not only are people offended, they are encouraging me to be offended.  The other day I was chatting with a friend who prefaced with, “I am sorry, I don’t mean to offend you”, before making a statement.  Her statement was not my personal belief, but certainly not offensive to me.  If I chose to be offended every time someone said, did, or acted in a way not perfectly aligned with my beliefs, I would be offended most of the time.  Why? Because everyone is different! Do you know anyone who believes EXACTLY the same as you, in all areas? I don’t.  The chances of knowing someone who agrees with every sentiment in your life is slim to none.  And yet, so many people are unconsciously seeking their imaginary twin. 

Why are we so afraid of living peacefully with differing opinions?  Why is it a “Cause to feel upset, annoyed and resentful”?

Unfortunately, I do not have the answer.  I have ideas, but would like to hear your opinions.  More to follow…

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